Point / Counterpoint: Tylenol and Autism
The Brotherhood of Railroad Engineers: “Bring on the Tylenol”
Look, we’ll level with you. We need autistic people. Always have. Who the hell else is going to memorize a 400-page timetable, show up on time, and actually like the sound of a diesel horn at 3 a.m.? Who else is going to know the difference between a GE ES44AC and an EMD SD70ACe just by the pitch of the turbocharger?
Problem is, some politicians got it into their heads that Tylenol causes autism. Trump said it, Dr. Oz drew a diagram, RFK Jr. tweeted something incoherent. Now pregnant women are scared to take it.
Bad for them. Worse for us. Now we got expecting mamas in the throes of incubation unable to assuage the pain of their headaches and the whole railroad system stuck with a dearth of engineers. Because fewer Tylenols means fewer autistic kids, and fewer autistic kids means fewer future engineers. So you tell me, do you want your freight delivered or not?
So here’s the plan: three to eight Tylenols a day during pregnancy. On an empty stomach. Or with black coffee. We’re not doctors, we’re railroad men. But we know what keeps the trains running. And it sure as hell isn’t a labor pool full of kids raised on chamomile tea, the most recent version of ivermectin, and “screen time moderation.”
If the price of America’s rail system is a nation of Tylenol babies, then hand us the bottle and a paper Dixie cup. We’ll keep the whistle blowing.
A Concerned Investor in Leucovorin Futures: “Tylenol is Obsolete”
From a market-driven perspective, it is clear that acetaminophen is not a sustainable solution for America’s developmental trajectory. Legacy analgesics introduce risk vectors without addressing the neurodiverse talent pipeline in a way that maximizes shareholder value.
Leucovorin, by contrast, represents a paradigm shift. With recent FDA approval, this folate-adjacent therapeutic unlocks opportunities to optimize neurological outcomes, reposition family health portfolios, and, most importantly, generate robust quarterly returns.
We urge stakeholders to look beyond outdated interventions like Tylenol and toward scalable, precision-medicine solutions such as leucovorin. The data is early, but early is where the growth is. The science is preliminary, but preliminary is where the margins are.
Families may worry about safety, efficacy, or whether any of this actually works. We don’t. We worry about capturing market share before Q4. Autism is not just a diagnosis — it’s a growth sector. And we intend to be on the ground floor.